We cancelled the Garage Sale Cam. We were going to point a live streaming webcam at our garage sale Saturday, November 11th. We canceled the cam because we canceled the entire garage sale. We canceled the garage sale because we remembered how much we hate them. We hate garage sales because we hate people.

Well, maybe we don’t actually hate people but we don’t always like them either. I believe the technical term for this mood swing is “Snowbird Anxiety Disorder.” I looked up “Snowbird” in the dictionary.

Snowbird (sno’burd) n, transient south Florida wildlife known for obnoxious complaining, and poor driving skills.

This definition seems pretty well on the mark. I’ve seen them driving on the streets (and curbs and medians) and I think to myself, “I don’t want these people driving in my neighborhood or parking near my house.” I’ve seen them in the stores and I think to myself, “I don’t want these people shopping in my driveway.” Don’t get me wrong, the people of south Florida are generally pretty nice. I just don’t want them in my yard at 5:45 a.m. with their flashlights. We lost our nerve so we’ve given all our crap away to the Boy Scouts who are holding a garage sale to raise money for something “Boy Scoutish.”

The idea to cancel the sale hit me when the election mess occurred. If you accidentally voted for Pat Buchanan I don’t want you in my yard. I have nothing against you if you voted for Pat Buchanan and meant to because that’s your right. Just don’t accidentally vote for the wrong candidate and then show up in my yard. I’m sure my homeowners policy won’t cover you if you stick your finger in the light socket instead of the doorbell.

Enough on the election? Okay but one more though. The media loves to make a big deal out of things. Despite what you see on T.V, most of Palm Beach county is pretty calm about this. We’re just as amused at the whole thing as you are. Most of us have a casual “wait and see” attitude. The country isn’t going to come to a screeching halt because we can’t count or punch the right holes. Yes you’re seeing demonstrators on TV but that’s largely because TV cameras are around. If the media would go away, the demonstrators would find something else to do.

Okay… maybe the fact that we don’t have a president-elect is impacting my life after all. It caused us to cancel our garage sale.